How to Navigate Holiday Stress While Healing: 7 Tips to Protect Your Peace
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Hey, bestie!
Fall is here, and before we know it, Thanksgiving will roll in, and then the festive season will officially take over. I’ll keep it real with you—Christmas Day is my favorite.
I love the cheer, the lights, the thoughtful gifts, the whole vibe. There’s something about that day that fills me with joy, even though I’ve never celebrated it in an extravagant way.
Honestly, for as long as I can remember, I’ve spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day by myself, cozied up in bed binge-watching cliché Christmas movies.
It’s like the one day that gives me permission to completely unwind without guilt.
But, bestie, let me hit you with another truth: the day after Christmas is always a little sad for me.
You see, while I enjoy my quiet time, I also really want to be part of the cheer—the traditions, the outings, the gift exchanges. I dreamed of having my own house, starting my own family traditions, hosting dinners, feeding people, and creating a space full of warmth and joy.
But my family wasn’t set up that way, and that longing sometimes turned into disappointment.
The holiday season is usually painted as this perfect time of joy, family gatherings, and festive cheer, but for those of us who are still healing, it can feel more like navigating a minefield of emotions.
Whether you’re dealing with trauma, grief, or simply trying to protect your peace, the season can trigger feelings you’ve been working hard to heal making healing during the holidays incredibly difficult. I get it; I’ve been there, too.
Why the Holiday Season Feels Overwhelming for Those Healing
The holiday season is complicated for me. I sat myself down at the beginning of my transformation journey and really asked, Why do I always feel so overwhelmed during the holidays, why the holiday season stress?
And here’s what I found: aside from the social anxiety, the season highlighted where I was in life versus where I wanted to be.
The fear of facing another year that didn’t go as planned, the mourning of missed opportunities, and seeing both my successful family members and those who aren’t doing too well—it all felt like a reminder of how far I was from my dreams and how close I was to my worst fears.
Family gatherings? Whew. They’re a whole different beast. I felt the weight of their unspoken questions:
Why isn’t your life going anywhere? What’s the plan? And even though they did not say it out loud, I could feel the expectations in the air. It’s a lot to carry.
How to Shift Your Mindset and Find Peace During the Holidays
That was a lot to unpack, right? But here’s the thing, bestie—we’re not just about self-awareness here, we’re about growth, healing, and moving forward. So, after recognizing these feelings, I asked myself some hard questions:
- If I didn’t care about what other people think of my life, how would I show up, and what would my mood be?
- Now that I know where all my negative feelings about the season come from, how am I going to overcome them?
- How do I want to celebrate my holidays this year?
(More indepth journal prompts here)
Whatever I decided that year, I stuck with it. Because guess what? I deserve to enjoy the season, just like anyone else. I did not let other people’s expectations or my own doubts steal my joy.
How to Protect Your Peace and Prioritize Healing During the Holidays
If you’re joining me on this journey, bestie, here’s a reminder: you are allowed to prioritize your well-being this holiday season.
That might mean skipping the family dinner or the office party if it triggers you. I’m not suggesting you isolate yourself from community, but sometimes, you need to step away from the community that makes you feel like hiding.
This holiday, give yourself permission to create your own traditions. Maybe binge-watch Christmas movies, but this time, sprinkle in a new ritual that brings you joy. Whatever you choose, make sure it’s something that feeds your soul and protects your peace.
You Deserve the Cheer, Too
At the end of the day, the cheer isn’t reserved for just a few people. You deserve to laugh, to feel joy, to participate in the festivities. The holiday season can still be a time of joy, even if you’re not exactly where you want to be in life.
And hey, maybe your struggles are bigger than mine were, and your reasons for dreading the season run deeper. But if you’re on this journey with me, remember that this too counts as one of those hard things you can overcome.
It may not feel easy, but you’re growing, bestie—and that’s something to celebrate.
7 Self-care tips for the holidays
1. Set Boundaries Without Guilt
The holiday season often brings social pressure. Family gatherings, work parties, and even friendly get-togethers can feel overwhelming.
If you’re still healing, the thought of attending these events can bring anxiety or discomfort. But here’s the thing: you have the right to protect your peace during holidays.
Give yourself permission to say “no” without guilt.
You’re not obligated to explain why, but if you feel like sharing, simply say you need this time for yourself. Trust me, bestie, it’s better to be absent and centered than present and unraveling.
2. Create a New Tradition for Yourself
Sometimes, the holiday traditions we once held dear feel heavy. Maybe it’s because they remind us of a time when things were different—before the trauma, loss, or pain entered our lives.
Instead of forcing yourself into old traditions that no longer serve you, why not create something new?
Maybe this year, your holiday tradition is spending Christmas morning in quiet reflection, journaling, or going for a peaceful walk. The important thing is to make this season meaningful to your journey—not someone else’s expectations.
3. Practice Mindful Self-Care
The holidays can quickly turn into a whirlwind of obligations, leaving little time for self-care. But this is precisely when you need to be most mindful of your needs. Check out my post on 15 Must Have Self Care Christmas Gifts For Yourself
Real self-care, as I always say, isn’t about quick fixes like face masks (though those are nice too!). It’s about tending to your mind, body, and soul in ways that truly fill your cup.
As you move through the season, check in with yourself regularly.
Ask: How am I feeling? What do I need right now? Whether it’s stepping away from a noisy environment to collect your thoughts or taking time out to meditate, make sure you are prioritizing your needs over the holiday hustle.
4. Give Yourself Permission to Feel
Healing isn’t linear, and the holidays can bring up unexpected emotions. One minute you may be filled with joy, and the next, you might be overwhelmed.
That’s okay. Give yourself permission to feel whatever comes up without judgment.
You don’t need to force yourself to be happy just because it’s the “season to be jolly.” Feeling sad, anxious, or even angry is part of your healing process, and the more you allow those feelings to surface, the less power they hold over you.
5. Surround Yourself With People Who Get It
Not everyone will understand what you’re going through, and that’s okay. But the people who do—your support system—are the ones who can make the holiday season more bearable.
Reach out to friends who have been supportive on your journey or who are going through something similar.
Sometimes, healing looks like a quiet night in with people who understand your need for solitude, not a grand event. Let these connections ground you when you feel overwhelmed. Managing holiday anxiety is so important.
6. Manage Your Expectations
A lot of holiday stress comes from unrealistic expectations—either from ourselves or others. We think we need to create the “perfect” holiday experience or that we should feel a certain way because it’s the holidays. Release yourself from these expectations.
Maybe this year isn’t about doing it all. Maybe it’s about doing less and being okay with that. Manage what you expect from the season and yourself, and let go of perfectionism. Healing doesn’t fit neatly into holiday timelines, and that’s perfectly fine.
7. Reflect on Your Progress
At the end of the season, it can be easy to focus on what didn’t go well or where you felt triggered. But don’t forget to reflect on the progress you’ve made.
Healing isn’t about never feeling pain again—it’s about learning how to navigate through it with more compassion and grace.
As you enter the new year, take some time to acknowledge how far you’ve come (In fact, I recommend this guided journal to help you unpack and reflect a few things before the year starts).
The fact that you’re even reading this post means you’re committed to your self improvement journey, and that’s something to celebrate.
Final Thoughts
Navigating the holiday season while healing can be challenging, but it doesn’t have to derail your progress.
Remember, bestie, your healing is worth protecting—no matter the season. So take it slow, listen to yourself, and give yourself grace. You deserve it.
Sending you love and light this holiday season.
What traditions help you protect your peace during the holiday season? Let me know in the comments!
